


A Unilateral Compromise Isn't

by Yubari (aquila_black)



Category: Loveless
Genre: Dubious Consent, M/M, Mind Games, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-03
Updated: 2012-12-03
Packaged: 2017-11-23 04:25:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/618046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aquila_black/pseuds/Yubari
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for the kmeme prompt: "Encounter in Seven Moons, only they’re all alone. Mindfuck, devotion, Seimei takes Ritsuka’s ears. Maybe he’s been saving his virginity for this?"</p><p>Ritsuka doesn't have his brother's talent for manipulation. Sometimes his feelings can guide him, but sometimes ... they play right into Seimei's hands.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Unilateral Compromise Isn't

Soubi stopped dead at the message still oozing down the wall, as if he'd reached the end of an invisible tether.

Ritsuka tried to snap him out of it. "C'mon, it's Seimei, it has to be!" he urged, but that didn't seem to help.

If it had been anyone else in the world waiting for him, Ritsuka would have stayed with Soubi. But it wasn't. Seimei still came first. He'd thought they both felt that.

"If you can't come with me ... I'm going to go find him without you," Ritsuka said.

Soubi squeezed his arms silently and then let go. Ritsuka took that as acceptance, if not assent, and padded up the hall alone. All his questions, loneliness, and heartache had brought him here. He would not hesitate. He had to know.

Seimei was waiting for him. Ritsuka stood in the doorway for a moment that felt endless, absorbing the sight of him, the _shock_ of finding his older brother alive. Then Ritsuka ran and hugged him so hard that they nearly lost their balance. He'd never been so glad to see anybody.

They stayed like that for a while, letting closeness and warmth fill them both. Talking could wait. _It seems,_ Seimei reflected to himself, _that I haven't lost you._ Moonlight filtered in through the tall windows of the library. Everything that could shone silver. Everything it touched cast a shadow, a distorted silhouette of perfect darkness.

Seimei ran the back of his hand against Ritsuka's cheek when Ritsuka pulled away a little. "I've missed you so much," he said. "Not a day went by when I didn't want you with me."

"Me too, Seimei," Ritsuka said, "I had a hole in my heart this whole time."

"We both did." Seimei kneeled just like he used to, so that Ritsuka wouldn't have to look up at him, and asked, "can you forgive me, Ritsuka? Am I still your beloved older brother?"

"How can you worry about that?" Ritsuka wanted to know. His fingers tensed in the thick folds of Seimei's coat. "You're already -"

"Wait," said Seimei, tucking a strand of hair back behind Ritsuka's ear, "I need you to answer me with perfect honesty. I love you more than anything. No matter which Ritsuka you are, or what you do, I will always love you. That's why I can't stand not knowing exactly how you feel about me."

Ritsuka didn't let go, but he lowered his eyes as he tried to sort out what he was feeling. Seimei watched him closely, reading the emotions that crossed his face. There was a glow of happiness, barely diminished by the way he was concentrating on what else he felt, followed by an emotion Seimei identified immediately as relief, from the many times he'd seen it. Then an almost-frown that looked like puzzlement or minor rejection ... disbelief, that was it, took over. And after that - an overcast, troubled sort of look crept over Ritsuka. Anger at being separated? That wasn't quite it. _At grieving all this time for his brother._ Seimei held his breath, hoping with all his heart that he was interpreting that correctly, and waited for Ritsuka to speak. 

"I don't love anyone the way I love you," said Ritsuka. "That's why it hurts so much that you left, and let us - let me - think we'd never see you again. If I need to forgive you, it's because nothing could have made me more miserable. If I'm mad, it's because it's scary to need someone this much."

Seimei bowed his head, barely managing to conceal how much his brother's words made him want to shout absolute victory from the rooftops. He was so close. But only fools said 'I've won' before they were certain of it. Before it was irreversibly done. So he made his voice soft and inviting, as he said, "is that all, Ritsuka? Have you heard nothing about me, while I was gone, that made you afraid of me?"

"I've heard awful things." Ritsuka said, meeting his eyes. "But ... I'd be sad if you think that's the real you. The Seimei I know is gentle and kind, and you're still my brother."

Silence reigned as Seimei thought about that. It wasn't as ringing an endorsement as he could have hoped for. Was this what betrayal sounded like, mere warmth where the sentiment should have been extreme, either way? Or was he misreading it? If there had been other observers, he wouldn't have taken his time. He would have assumed that a qualified yes, a yes with reservations, was really a no. But perhaps it could be manipulated into something more suitable. After all, this wasn't a mere test in the sense that he was indifferent to the outcome. He wanted to give Ritsuka a chance to be his once again. But only that ... he had to perceive what there was dispassionately, with his eyes and not his heart. Distance filtered into them. "How can you say that you'll only accept _parts_ of me, Ritsuka?"

"I -" Ritsuka looked horrified. Seimei could tell that he'd hit squarely on all his insecurities about being the 'real' Ritsuka, and made Ritsuka feel like he'd turned that rejection on the person he loved most. Ritsuka was tense and restless with the immediate need to undo it, right down to a physical level. Seimei could feel the strain go through his little body and accumulate there, with each passing moment of not knowing how to make this right. But something was holding him back from saying the words Seimei needed. Some inner caution warned him, apparently, because Ritsuka didn't speak. And then, when he spoke, they weren't the words Seimei needed. They weren't _I'm yours_ or _no matter what you're like, I accept you._

Seimei decided to turn the screws further. "Don't restrict me like this. Don't love me with conditions, and force me to disown parts of myself. I won't do it. I can't live in pieces, Ritsuka."

He could see Ritsuka's thoughts racing, trying to come up with a solution, a third option, _something_ to keep the distance these words opened up between them from becoming impassable ... permanent. "I love you," the boy whispered, through dry lips.

"Then give yourself to me, Ritsuka," Seimei said. The pressure in his voice was almost imperceptible - a thin, warm strand of magic in the dark.

The conflict in Ritsuka's eyes was perfectly apparent. He wanted, hesitated, and couldn't stand the choice. Trusting this person whom he only partially recognized as Seimei was anathema. Rejecting him was unthinkable. All of his words shrank away from Seimei's request, but he didn't.

Ritsuka kissed him.

Seimei froze at the first brush of lips against the side of his mouth. Something deep in his chest unclenched a little, with the realization that Ritsuka would cross this line for him. With him. He'd wanted ... but this was another part of himself that he'd always shielded Ritsuka from. If not entirely, at least enough. Desire unfolded in him, responsive and immediate, and reflexively, Seimei held it back. Ritsuka had obviously picked up bad habits from Soubi. And if Soubi had dared to kiss his brother, he would have him horsewhipped. Possessive anger vied for his attention for a moment, but Seimei had too much practice masking his emotions to confuse Ritsuka. His fighter would be dealt with in due time. Whereas Ritsuka deserved all the tenderness Seimei felt for him. 

_All the affection and devotion a real person has to offer,_ Seimei thought quietly, slipping a hand snugly behind Ritsuka's waist as the other caught the back of his head, _this love, that puts me on my knees before you alone, I give to you._

Seimei lifted Ritsuka's mouth to his as reverently as if he'd been kissing an angel. It was a dry, inexperienced, slightly awestruck sort of kiss, light as anything. Careful. Gentle. Entranced. He felt Ritsuka's arms tense around him a little before relaxing into a more comfortable hug. Then it was Seimei who startled momentarily as Ritsuka poked the very tip of his tongue out and touched him with it. There was unexpected wetness. Not-me-ness. If it had been anyone else, Seimei would have been phenomenally disgusted, but he wasn't. Ritsuka had accepted his kiss, and shown him what else was okay with him, and Seimei had to swallow hard and push past his own hesitations to touch his own tongue against Ritsuka's mouth. He knew, more or less, how this went. But doing it himself, with the only person in the world that he'd ever wanted, was nothing like skimming over the mechanics of sex or darting past the filthy degenerates that moaned and groped each other in public. It was a difference in kind; pure and sacred, soft and warm. Ritsuka seemed to feel safe as Seimei kissed him. A blush had bloomed high across his cheeks and his eyes were partly closed. He was leaning into Seimei in the most delicious way.

Seimei was radiating kindness, acceptance, and a buoyant determination to show him that this part of his heart had not changed. He was so sincere. There was no sign of dissonance or effort in the way he embraced Ritsuka; the hands that held his brother had finger-painted with Ritsu's blood not an hour earlier, but nothing in his touch betrayed that. Nothing about him was scary when he looked at Ritsuka, eyes full of emotion, except the distant awareness that Seimei had done things that Ritsuka didn't know about, and things that Ritsuka didn't piece together until much later. How could someone so wonderful be bad? _Not to you,_ Seimei's whole presence reassured, _you are my treasure._ And Ritsuka felt that nothing Seimei had ever done had made him question that.

The gears were turning invisibly in Seimei's head. He'd lost himself for a moment, in the bliss of having his brother back and more his than he'd been to begin with; his in a way that he'd never gotten permission to see him or touch him, although desire had been there, under the surface this whole time. Now it wasn't hidden. Now Ritsuka initiated these touches. Seimei understood them for what they were - a way of accepting what Ritsuka couldn't accept with words; a way of reaching for life together, life entwined; a way of trusting. Sort of trusting, anyhow. He took it without hesitation, without remorse. It wasn't _all_ he wanted, but they could start here. He'd be in a better position to arm twist, if he had to, after Ritsuka had given him this. They'd be alone together, even more than before. It was another secret, another thing that no one else would understand. Even if he hadn't wanted to, he would be able to see how it would benefit him, and the fact was he wanted this very much. The part of him that schemed as Ritsuka reached out to him was hidden deep, tick-ticking away so far inside it couldn't be seen or heard. Its presence reassured Seimei, because he could feel it looking out for him. He had no one but himself to rely on, so he needed it alert, awake, and manipulating. And to do something as important as this, he needed its blessing. The interplay between himself and the nameless, hidden awareness that guided him was immediate and invisible. Just by sensing it, he intuitively knew ... not just whether to push, or where, but how hard.

Seimei brushed a hand over the warm, furred skin of Ritsuka's cat ear. It was only a little softer than his hair. Fine, black fur sleeked against the pads of his fingers and poked against him when he switched direction to rub the place where they met Ritsuka's head. "I've missed these as well." He said, slipping his other hand suggestively under Ritsuka's jacket to stroke the length of his tail. 

Ritsuka's tail curled around Seimei's hand, as if trying to hold it still. He could feel every little bone joint adjust to his petting as he wrapped his hand around it and stroked.

"I can't believe you still have yours." Ritsuka said, stretching a hand out to touch his brother's ears. They were much bigger, adult-sized, but even that didn't really account for it. Shinonome-sensei still had her ears, but they weren't like this - tall and wide like a fox's. The tip twitched back twice, reflexively, before holding still. Ritsuka ran his thumb along the inside and his fingers along the outside, brushing wiry, black fur all along the edge, and Seimei shivered with enjoyment.

"Why would I touch anyone else, Ritsuka?" Seimei asked, pausing his petting for a moment to trace little circles on the fabric around the base of Ritsuka's tail.

Seimei could feel Ritsuka's hand tense on his ear. The sensation crept out fast as thought, demanding attention. His whole head was extra aware that something was touching that ear, almost too hard, and it had to do with another person who had touched him on purpose. It wasn't freaking him out, because it was Ritsuka. But even though he looked relaxed, his whole body was on something of a hair trigger. Both ears swiveled infinitesimally forward as Ritsuka opened his mouth to respond.

"I've never understood ... why I'm so special to you. Why we're so close. It's not normal for brothers, is it?" Ritsuka said.

"It's normal for us," Seimei replied. "I've felt this as long as I've known you, Ritsuka. You don't have to worry that I'll change."

Ritsuka's eyes closed a little. The sound of his brother's voice on his name was so reassuring. "I want to ask you more questions," he said, resting his head against Seimei's shoulder. He was coming down from an adrenaline-spiked panic, and it showed.

Seimei smiled. "I hope you'll reconsider that," he said. "I don't like questions." The hand that had been stroking Ritsuka's tail wrapped around his waist under his winter clothes, pulling him against Seimei's chest. The other left his head to hug him by the shoulders, before starting to slide down the zipper on his jacket.

"But -" Ritsuka started to object, as Seimei slid his jacket off him.

Seimei was inclined to argue with him. He just thought it might be more convincing if he didn't. This time, the kiss he gave Ritsuka was wet; open-mouthed, tongue-against-tongue, and if Ritsuka's expression was anything to go by, he'd managed to make both of them lightheaded. This was, hopefully, the right approach? Ritsuka started struggling to undo the catches on Seimei's big, heavy greatcoat, so Seimei took that as a good sign. He lay down on their wrinkled jackets, pulling Ritsuka along with him, guiding the boy so that he was sitting roughly on top of Seimei's erection. They rubbed against each other on the ground, heedless of everything. Seimei rubbed his hands against Ritsuka's thighs in a way that made his breath come out in gasps and the blush across his cheeks deepen. Ritsuka put a hand hesitantly against the bulge in Seimei's pants and rubbed, and Seimei made a tiny noise in the back of his throat and kissed him again, ferociously, possessively, with aggression covering an _I need you_ so heartfelt that he didn't want to admit it existed. But if anything could make that less abominable to him, it was the fact that Ritsuka kissed him back.

Seimei found himself with his hand inside Ritsuka's pants in no time, flat, stroking and pushing against him, but his detachment caught up with him and slowed him down. He made Ritsuka unlace and remove his boots, peeled Ritsuka's pants and underwear off him, and wriggled unselfconsciously out of his own clothes. Then Seimei shifted Ritsuka's hips over next to his head, and took the tip of his penis into his mouth. Ritsuka's eyes went wide just before he fell over sideways. In the split second Seimei had to decide whether to let go or hold on, he saw all of Ritsuka's muscles relax at once, as if he'd flipped some sort of physiological switch in his brother. Seimei decided to risk it, and felt Ritsuka's cock make a quarter-turn in his mouth. He sucked, as if nothing had happened, and was rewarded with a yelp that quickly turned into a moan. 

Ritsuka moved closer to him, hips pushing disconcertingly forward against his face. What Seimei couldn't tell, from where he was laying, was that Ritsuka had gotten close enough to - oh, but he felt it, when Ritsuka licked him. The electric shock of it was indescribable, when Ritsuka clamped his lips around the head of Seimei's erection and dragged his tongue over it. Seimei's first impulse was to jerk away and say "don't touch it. That's dirty." But there was nothing that could contaminate Ritsuka.

All his nerves were singing with the sensation, with the bliss of ... it was both the hottest thing he'd ever imagined, and too volatile to think about directly. Too much. Like a memory you could ruin just by taking it out and looking at it in the light of day. It was a secret thing, a perfect thing, and his mind wrapped protectively around it, shielding him, even as Seimei held Ritsuka's straining hips in his hands and took more of Ritsuka's length into his mouth with a moan. It became complicated. The moment he started hitting the back of his throat with Ritsuka's cock, Seimei gagged so hard he had trouble not throwing up on the spot, and curled in on himself reflexively, panting. Shaking. Well, that was ... not as planned. Ritsuka looked out of it, to say the least, but worried. He'd been sucking quietly on the end of Seimei's cock and working his hands over the shaft, but he turned, letting it fall out of the corner of his mouth, when he realized something was wrong. It was the most erotic thing Seimei had ever witnessed, only slightly marred by the question that came out of Ritsuka's mouth.

"Are you okay?"

Seimei nodded wordlessly, swallowed once, and went back to what he was doing with a little more caution. He moaned as Ritsuka licked him, several long strokes in quick succession, before settling back in with his mouth around the head. The misstep had pulled his judgment back into the process. Seimei realized, in an abstract way, that this might be one of the most dangerous things he could do with Ritsuka - let Ritsuka touch him in a way that made him lose track of who was in control. That was it. Someone was always in control, and it was supposed to be him. He had to keep his wits about him. He could let go, perhaps, if he made Ritsuka surrender more. And first. That was how this worked, wasn't it? That was ... his pleasure kept escalating steadily, but Seimei held on to his thoughts, though it cost him. He would not be some _animal_ , controlled by desire or fear. He would maneuver. He would prevail.

He focused intently on how Ritsuka was reacting to him. More pressure was not better, apparently, but light touches made him moan. And opening his mouth and letting spit cool on all but the thin strip that the tip of his tongue was drawing over Ritsuka's cock made the tongue on Seimei's erection falter and lose its coordination. Seimei smiled to himself and kept experimenting.

Seimei had some idea of what was happening when Ritsuka's hands constricted on his cock, painfully hard, and his hips bucked energetically forward. He clamped his mouth around the head of Ritsuka's erection and sucked. It was still something of a surprise to have several spurts of viscous liquid in his mouth. He'd sort of - well, he hadn't exactly planned to swallow it. Ritsuka was pure and clean, yes, but ugh. It felt like it was moving on its own in his mouth, so he grabbed one of the library trashcans without a second thought and spit the contents of his mouth into it. It looked about as unappetizing as it tasted, but that was sex for you, wasn't it: messy, sticky, and loathsome. He supposed that was to be expected. After all, even the most wonderful sex in the world was still sex. He cleaned his mouth on the back of his hand and went back to Ritsuka, who was staring at him and looking very vulnerable indeed.

Seimei laid back down next to him and gathered him into his arms. "It's okay," he soothed.

"Did you - should I -?" Ritsuka didn't seem to know what to ask, even.

"No." Seimei hugged Ritsuka against him and bucked his hips playfully against Ritsuka's. "We're both learning how to do this." 

That made Ritsuka blush again, but he hugged onto Seimei. After a moment, his hand crept down to Seimei's erection. "I want you to finish too," Ritsuka said, in a hushed undertone.

Seimei eyed Ritsuka and wrapped his own hand around his cock, before Ritsuka stilled it.

"No, I mean ... I want to do it." Ritsuka said, and to Seimei's surprise, his blush was actually subsiding.

After a moment's hesitation, Seimei let go of him. Ritsuka sidled back down his body and took Seimei's erection in his mouth again. When he didn't have anything to do to distract his attention, the sensation was almost overpowering. Better than before. They'd been curled to reach each other before, because Ritsuka was still somewhat smaller than Seimei, but it wasn't necessary now, and that gave Seimei an idea. He grabbed Ritsuka by the hips and lifted him onto his chest as he rolled onto his back. Ritsuka's legs splayed open on his upper chest, giving him a fantastic view of Ritsuka's ass and tail, still moving back and forth in excitement. Ritsuka squeaked a little in the back of his throat, sending a vibration along the length of Seimei's cock, as Seimei started fondling his buttocks. For some reason, the change of position made Ritsuka take him in deeper. Seimei ran his fingers lightly over Ritsuka's lower back and tail as Ritsuka sucked him. He massaged the boy's legs before finding the sensitive spots on his feet and touching them lovingly. _His, from head to toe._ With that thought, Seimei came in Ritsuka's mouth, in long strokes that ended up making Ritsuka cough and dribble white liquid out the corner of his mouth. He scrambled over to the trashcan in a hurry and spit, before making his way slowly, a little shakily, back to Seimei.

Seimei was waiting for him with an open, charming smile. "I love you, Ritsuka," he said quietly. They were words he'd said so often. But words that, by the look of it, Ritsuka had been dying to hear.

Ritsuka opened his mouth and for a moment, nothing came out. Then, he said, "Good, because ... you have me. I'm scared, Seimei. What's going to happen to us?"

Seimei gathered him in his arms again. "Now that I have you? Absolutely nothing. C'mon, get your clothes back on. We're going."

Seimei had assumed there was no one else in earshot who knew what he meant by that. But Soubi, who'd pulled himself together enough to come and guard the door, crumpled to the ground when he heard this. Seimei locked eyes with him coldly as they left the library. "I need three things from you," he said, as if it had been yesterday that he'd given Soubi his last real order, and not a year ago. "You will recover Nisei for me. You will kill every person here. And you will present yourself, when I call for you, along with Ritsu-sensei's plaited whip. You have no discretion in this matter. Have I made my will absolutely clear to you?"

Soubi nodded, eyes downcast. "Yes, sir."

"Good. Now let us out."

Soubi made the mistake of looking at Ritsuka, and earned a sound blow from Seimei for his audacity. Ritsuka, enveloped in what looked, to Soubi's spell-sensitive eyes, like a thicket of Seimei's darkest magic, gave no sign of understanding or recognition. _I'm damned,_ he thought, wildly. _And because of me, you are. You should hate me, Ritsuka. I let this happen ..._ but he lifted his head and did as he was told. Then he went through the school half-praying for the impossible: someone, anyone, who could stop him.


End file.
